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Disclaimer: Slayers belongs to Hajime Kanzaka,
and I make no profit from this story
Zelgadiss turned, trying not to let his annoyance be too obvious. He adjusted his new clothes, hoping he could ignore them. Then Amelia was laughing and the chimera let his gaze travel from his pants to the princess.
There, sitting atop Amelia’s head, was that horrible plushie (Lina was right, for once, when she called him that). They were both laughing, and Amelia pulled a piece of the cotton candy she held to hand feed it that stupid animal.
He wasn’t jealous. Of course he wasn’t, he was Zelgadiss, dark sorcerer-swordsman, he was above emotions like envy. And even though her hand had brushed Pocota’s face, even though they’re cheeks were both flushed slightly, he wasn’t jealous. The little monster’s ear/paw thing ‘accidentally’ yanked at the ribbon holding the princess’ short dress up. No, no, nope, that smell of salt was from the sea, not his tears.
Instead of hitting him, grabbing him by the ear-things and swinging him into the wall, fireball-ing him, kicking him till he was just a red smear, Amelia just laughed and adjusted her outfit. Indeed, the two shared a smile, as though they’d just shared an inside joke. Zelgadiss had had enough.
Just as he was about to say something, (yell ‘Fire!’) or run over to them and attack Pocota, the two stepped into one of the rooms. He could hear Amelia say something, Pocota laughing, and then Zelgadiss was pushing aside tourists and crew members to get to that room.
“Amelia.” He gave her a short nod at her startled expression. His heart was in his throat, and his chest hurt, but none of the strain from running so fast was on his face.
“Hey, Mister Zelgadiss.”
Pocota looked at him, and Zelgadiss wondered if his own expression matched that big-eared basta--
“So, are you going anywhere?”
Amelia was smiling, looking him over. The chimera almost smiled back. She had been the one to help him decide on some new relaxed and casual clothes, since Gourry and Lina had somehow gotten blood on his old clothes. The little princess had made him try on thirty or so outfit until she’d decided on just the right ones. Most of them were blue and white, and all had fit him well. All of his friends’ had complimented his new white jacket especially.
She looked like she was about to fix his clothes, and Zelgadiss wondered suddenly if she ever had fixed Pocota’s little tacky red cape.
“Where did you get that cotton candy?”
“There was this guy selling it on deck.” The dark-haired girl suddenly looked guilty, and a tad scared. “I, um, kind of got the last one.”
“So?”
This time, Pocota answered. “Lina was next in line.”
“Oh.”
Zelgadiss rubbed the back of his neck, suddenly unsure of what to say. Then he heard something akin to the sound of a thousand fingers on a thousand chalk boards.
They all turned at the sound of the scratchy voice that echoed through the ship. Was…was she saying something about cotton--
Amelia grabbed his arm, yanking at him, her mouth opening and closing like a fish. The chimera could do nothing but let her drag him. Like a frightened animal, Amelia’s eyes darted around, looking for a place to hide.
“I swear, if I see her again, I’ll jam that cotton candy up—“
“Lina?” Gourry’s calm voice was a balm for Lina’s.
“And her little chimera too!”
Zelgadiss, ever nimble on his toes, grabbed Amelia and pulled her into the closet. The doors closed together with a sharp slam that made Amelia wince. Pocota mumbled something about the doors just barely missing his hair.
Oddly, Zelgadiss felt a sense of forbidding as soon as the doors came together, as though he’d done something awful. But, that was just silly.
There were slits in the door, and Zelgadiss wondered what the point was. To dry the clothes, to…
To spy on people?
“Shoo, be quiet. Never know who’s listening.”
“I guess.” Then the tall man was leaning over to whisper something in her ear. Lina smirked and said something else. The door behind them nearly knocked the frame off as Gourry kicked it closed.
Gourry pulled Lina closer, arms going around her. He lifted her up, muttering something that made the red-head smile. The sorceress’ arms went around him. They looked like something out of a bad romance novel.
Amelia giggled slightly. Pocota laughed. Zelgadiss even felt some amusement. It didn’t last long.
Lina’s hands were fast, anyone who’d eaten with her knew that. Zelgadiss was well aware of the fact that Lina could been very swift in and out of battle of any kind. Or, at least, he’d thought he knew that she was fast. Even seeing her in fights or at the dinner table (which were fights of some kind), didn’t compare to seeing how *quick* her hands were as they pulled her guardian’s pants down.
Amelia let out a little gasp Zelgadiss barely heard. From the corner of his eye, he saw her raise her hands to cover her mouth. Pocota’s ear-paw things did the same to his own mouth. The cotton candy fell to the ground, forgotten.
They couldn’t hear anything at first. Just silence. It didn’t last long.
Then Gourry was moaning, and his voice filled the world. Zelgadiss felt detached as his own hand went to his mouth to cover it. Amelia made a small choking sound as Lina’s hands went in places they shouldn’t have gone in front of their friends.
The tall swordsman was whispering something, as his best friend ran her hand down his length. Zelgadiss had seen things like this before, in books, and once when he’d walked unannounced into a bathhouse and had been confronted with the image of a surprised and embarrassed Gourry. But, this was…
Gourry was pulling up Lina’s dress, and the chimera noticed for the first time today, and the ninth time in history, how bad the red-head’s taste was, especially in clothes. Lina’s dress was pink and white and yellow and didn’t match. It was like someone had thrown random bit of the same material together to sow it, and had been color blind. So, it didn’t come as much of a surprise that her bra was a bright, eye-searing shade of yellow, while her underwear was a dainty pink. The pink didn’t really look quite right on Lina, it might have looked better on…
Zelgadiss glanced warily at Amelia. Her eyes were huge in her little head, and he wondered if it were possible for someone’s eyes to fall out of their sockets and dangle on the stalks. Pocota’s breathing was harsh, and he wished very much for very many reasons for him to not be on Amelia’s head.
This wasn’t right. They shouldn’t be seeing their friends like this; it was wrong and just sick. Plus, it violated their friend’s privacy. Wait, was that Lina sitting on his bed? What…oh, gods, his *pillow.* His comfortable blanket that he’d had for years, all those pillows, the sheets, the feather mattress…they’d all have to be burned now.
What they should do is just step out of the closet, with their hands up, and hope Lina was quick with their deaths. Hopefully, there wouldn’t be too much collateral damage.
*Just, reach for the door knob, Zelgadiss. Come on, are you a coward, no, you’re Zelgadiss, and you’re not--*
Gourry’s pants hit the closet with a rattle that made them all gasp. Luckily, Lina was too busy playing with herself with one hand, while the other rummaged through her messy cape. Zelgadiss had never been so grateful for Lina’s disgusting slovenly behavior. Then Gourry was pushing down his boxers to follow Lina’s example while he waited for her to find whatever, and Zelgadiss wished Lina could just keep her damn *cape* (it was a cape for gods’ sake) orderly.
The tips of his fingers were touching the door to the closet. Gently, Amelia pulled his hand back to his side.
“It’s too late now, Mister Zelgadiss.”
Her voice sounded so full of regret, so much older than her years. Her hand stayed on his face a second, tracing his index finger oddly. Then she seemed to come back into her world and pulled her hand away. Zelgadiss tried not to focus on that. It made things…hard. Harder. *Hard.*
The sorceress pulled a sunhat out of one of the pockets and a squeeze bottle in the shape of a bear. Gourry gave her a wicked grin Zelgadiss didn’t know he even possessed. Then the big blond man was jumping on the bed, (his bed, his poor bed), yelling something while Lina yelled something back, and landing on the red-head.
Today was a day for terrible discoveries he was beginning to learn. Today, he’d learned that his bed could probably withstand his own weight if it could support those two. He’d also learned what his very platonic and very un-sexually attractive friends’ pubic hair looked like, which was never a good thing.
That bed. Zelgadiss couldn’t get over it. The honey…it was *everywhere*. That sunhat was on Lina’s head, and Zelgadiss decided to just look at the pretty white ribbon around it than noticed the body underneath it. They were both grunting like baboons, or whales or some unattractive and large animal, and the chimera wondered what happened to them being quiet.
Oh, gods, he didn’t need to see them like this. He could see terrible things. How could he ever look them in the eye again? Would he always imagine them like this, with limbs arched and bent, clothes off or barely on, that sunhat’s ribbon? Would he forever hear their moaning?
Suddenly, he could hear Pocota crying, so softly, and he wondered how long the little animal had been doing that. Amelia was whispering a prayer, and he wondered if some god, (or Mazoku, either way, he’d be happy) would hear her, and their hearts would stop. Or the roof of the cabin would cave in. Or lightning would strike. Or someone would set fire to the boat in an attempt to burn it down.
The sorceress yelled some nonsense, their hair was all over, but it wasn’t enough to cover them, it would never be enough, and Gourry kept calling her ‘Sorceress Extreme’ which Zelgadiss didn’t understand and didn’t want to and he wished he were dead. He wished everyone was dead, that no one had been born, and Lina and Gourry had chosen a position that didn’t allow him to see their asses.
He wanted to close his eyes. But they just wouldn’t stay shut.
They were getting louder, and Zelgadiss began whimpering. What little attraction there had been to seeing people having sex had long since disappeared. The hat was somehow on Gourry’s head, but Zelgadiss didn’t know how or why it was there. Lina kept yelling and yanking Gourry’s hair, and the swordsman was crying ‘Extreme’ over and over again. The bed board was in pieces Zelgadiss abruptly noticed. The honey bottle rolled over to the closet, and Zelgadiss saw the beady dark eyes glinting in the sun coming from the window.
*If I stare into that blackness long enough, those eyes, I’ll go insane.*
Lina grabbed the hat off Gourry’s head, grinning maniacally. Her leg was up, the honey, *everywhere* and Zelgadiss shuddered. If he *had* to see two people having sex, why couldn’t it be two strangers? Why couldn’t he be alone, or maybe just with Amelia?
Gourry was on his knees then, ass pointed, (Zelgadiss swore it was) exactly in the chimera’s direction. His mouth was in the honey, and the chimera refocused on the little white ribbon. So innocent, so pure…wait, was there *honey* on the hat too?
When he’d been little, before he’d been transformed, Zelgadiss remembered feeling a little sorry for Rezo. Just a little. ‘Being blind would be terrible,’ he could remember thinking. Now, he wished his eyes had been sealed shut. If Rezo could go through his life like that, found some way around it, then so could he. Then, he would’ve only had to hear them moaning. Zelgadiss could have just imagine them fighting and/or eating instead of them having sex.
Lina was yelling at Gourry, calling him a ‘steak,’ and Zelgadiss had no idea anyone could be so flexible. Her feet were on the wall, and then there was something else to burn. A piece of bed board was thrown, crashing through the closet and narrowly missing Pocota’s head by a scant inch.
All of the hissed--including Lina and Gourry, albeit for different reasons.
Amelia was leaning against the wall. Her face was something Zelgadiss could not describe. Then, Pocota was gone.
His eyes widened. How the gods/Mazoku heard his wish?
Then the chimera saw. Another door, there were two entrances. Two of them, and Pocota had just slipped off her head after she’d accidentally opened the other door.
It was dark. The windows in this room completely shuttered. That’s why he couldn’t tell there was another exit out: no light coming in from the other slats.
None could look at each other. Although Pocota flew back to Amelia’s head. He seemed to get some comfort from that, and Zelgadiss could no longer feel any jealousy for the little beast.
“I think…I think I’ll…”
“Get a massage?”
“*What?*”
“Nothing. You look tense. Nothing.”
“I…think I’ll get some fresh air.” Pocota slid off Amelia’s head, flying almost drunkenly in the opposite direction of where the entrance of the deck was located. Zelgadiss wondered if he should say something. But, words were so *hard* right now.
*Hard*
The honey.
Did Amelia like honey?
…Maybe he did need a massage?
“I, I have to go. To pay for the…stuff.” Her eyes were still wide and unfocused.
“Yeah. That’s good.”
“Mister Zelgadiss?” Something had crept into her voice, and tears were in her eyes.
“Amelia. Let’s just…let’s just go pay for our rooms.”
“Mister Zelgadiss? Do, do you ever think we’ll be the same again?”
There was only one answer he could give.
“No.”
~~~~~~~~~~
“Mmm,” She licked a smear of honey from his chin. “So, again tonight?”
“Uh.” The sun made his hair glow, and Lina tugged at a strand playfully.
“Is that a yes?”
“Yeh.” His eyes were still dazed.
“I hope we cleaned up well enough. Although, not like it’s the first time we’ve done it on his bed.”
“Yep.”
“At least this time his clothes weren’t on it.”
“Had a hard time getting the cherry stains out of his shirt.”
“Remember when we told him it was blood?”
“Yeah.”
“And last time—“
“Thank god it was a *white* tunic.”
“Yeah. It’s a good thing Amelia wears so much white too.”
“Maybe we should be more careful?”
“You think so?”
“Meh.”
“Right.” She stretched out on the chair. She had some tanning to do. “It’s not like we’ve been caught yet.”
“Right. Say, you know what I found in the closet?”
“Hm?”
“Some cotton candy, and part of Zel’s hair stuck in the wall.”
“That’s funny. I haven’t seen Amelia or Zelgadiss all day. Think they were…”
“I haven’t seen Pocota either.”
“That’s just sick Gourry.”
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