Changes - A Change of Soul

Author: Ashvolt Title: Changes - A Change of Soul

A Change of Soul
They talk...
By Ashvolt

Hey baby I'm talking to you
Stop yourself and listen
Some things you can never choose
Even if you try, yeah
You're bangin' your head again
Cause somebody won't let you in
One chance...one love
Your chance to let me know

Zelgadis jerked his head up at the unexpected sound on his room's door. Damn, he hadn't thought Sylphiel would try and convince him to come back till later. Oh well; it was his fault for not leaving the city when he had the chance. He sighed, shook his head warily, and opened the door up a crack.

"Yeah?" he asked, predicting that Sylphiel's concerned voice would come floating toward him. The voice that floated across wasn't hers, and left him temporarily stunned.

"Zelgadis?" Lina called, sounding both worried and annoyed at the same time.

All he could do for a few moments was blink in shock. His second reaction was to curse softly under his breath. Hadn't fate had enough fun with him already?! They'd already arranged it so Lina was getting married to Gourry, and he was supposed to be their best man! Now she was probably here to convince him to come back and witness her union with another man. No, no, no, no, no, no...

"Zel...I think you need to hear what I have to tell you," she said hesitantly.

Lina...she's nervous... Zelgadis thought incredulously. Slowly, he unlocked it the rest of the way, and confronted a face he thought he'd never see again without Gourry at her side.

"Lina...? I wasn't...wasn't expecting you..." he gulped, eyes wide.

Despite her apprehension, she laughed at his expression. "I can see that! Can I come in?"

Nodding, he stepped away from the door and let her pass. Inside, he wondered, What's she doing here? What does she want to tell me? Is it...about...Gourry...?

Lina looked around the small room. It was bare of all furnishings except for a narrow bed, a small, uncomfortable-looking chair, and a small table. On it rested an oil lamp, presently unlit. The window curtains were drawn, pitching the room into an unnatural darkness. Only a few hints of light managed to get through the heavy drapery, sending Zelgadis's expression into shadows.

She focused back on Zelgadis, and noted that he wasn't wearing his cloak for once; it was presently draped across the chair. On the seat rest his two dark-brown belts. She gulped again.

"Why are you here, Lina?" he asked emotionlessly.

"I...came to..." she paused when she heard the mask over his voice, blocking out emotions, and all thoughts of telling him about Gourry and Sylphiel flew from her brain. Instead she said, "Why are you here, Zelgadis?"

He shrugged and explained, "I didn't want to stay for the wedding."

"Oh," she muttered. "Those jewels you gave me...thank you. But...I saw a memory of you...and me... That means you created those tears. Why...why did you cry, Zel?" Lina asked softly. She had to know for some odd reason, before she told him about Gourry and Sylphiel. Could he have cried for her...?

He sucked in his breath quickly, startled. Although he should have expected her to ask, for some reason it hadn't occurred to him. He suppressed a groan of mingled horror and irritation. "It's none of your business," he growled faintly, turning away from her.

"Of course it's my business! You're...you're a friend..."

No response. He simply stood there, shutting her out, unwilling to talk to her.

Abruptly, she got angry at his behavior. She was his friend! He should be able to tell her what was wrong! "Damn it, Zel!" she shouted, angrily stepping up to his back and grasping the cream-colored cloth. "Stop shutting me out and talk to me! Tell me what's wrong! I don't like to see you in pain!"

We can't go on
Just running away
If we stay any longer
We will surely never get away
Anything you want - we can make it happen
Stand up and turn around
Never let them shoot us down
Never - Never
Never - Never run away

He shook his head once in the blackness, and whispered, "You can't help me Lina." In a louder voice, he stated, "I need to leave."

Frowning, Lina pleaded near his ear, "Please, Zel! Don't run from the wedding...from me. Tell me what's wrong, and I promise I'll fix it! Turn around and talk to me..."

To her surprise, he listened and ever so slightly began to shift, so finally he was facing her again. She still stood near him, but this time grasped the cloth covering his chest, refusing to let go. She felt if she let go, she'd never be able to get this close again...

His voice cracked as he said, "Even you...even you can't fix this Lina...although you're the only person who could help..." He gulped back tears that threatened his eyes and squeezed his eyes shut tightly against the sight in front of him, clinging to him. It was too much...

"Zel..."

The mask fell for a moment, though Lina couldn't see it in the nearly lightless room. All she knew was that suddenly his shoulders started to tremble, as if suppressing tears, and a light hand tenderly brushed a lock of fiery red hair away from the side of her face.

Hey baby you know it's true
Why you bother lying when you know
That you want it too
Don't you dare deny me
walk those legs right over here
Give me what I'm dying for
One chance...one love
Hold me down never let me go

The hand fell away and he tore himself away from her hands, striding across to the other end of the room, as far away from her that he could get. Desperately, he reined in his whirling thoughts and controlled his face so all it again showed was icy coolness. It didn't matter she couldn't see it, because as long as he could control the emotions playing across his face, he could also control the feelings coming through in his voice. When one shattered under her innocent assault, the other quickly followed.

I can't tell her why her wedding causes me so much pain. Gods, I'm amazed she hasn't guessed the reason yet! No matter what, I can't tell her... She's engaged to Gourry! If I told her, she might feel guilty, and it could overshadow her love for Gourry. I couldn't ever do that to her; I couldn't consciously ruin her happiness.

"I need to know, Zel. Why did you cry?" Lina again whispered. She longed to shout at him, Walk right back over here where I can keep a firm grip on you and tell me what I'm dying to know! Hold me and never let me go, you stupid chimera! Stop making me pry the information from you! But she was afraid if she did that, he'd retreat into his mask again, and this time she wouldn't be able to draw him out.

Zelgadis took a deep, steadying breath. She kept on asking him something he couldn't tell her! He couldn't tell her the reason behind his crying...

We can't go on
Just running away
If we wait any longer
We will surely never get away
Anything you want - we can make it happen
Stand up and turn around
Never let them shoot us down
Never - Never
Never - Never run away
Never - Never
Never - Never run away

"Tell me something, Lina. Will you be happy when you're married to Gourry?" he asked, trying to keep a telling quiver out of his voice.

Lina bit her lip. "I forgot. I don't know how I forgot, since it was half the reason I came here, but..." She walked up to him and put a hand on his shoulder. "Zelgadis, you misunderstood about the wedding. Gourry isn't marrying me. He's marrying Sylphiel."

Zelgadis couldn't think, could barely even stand. No, he hadn't heard her right. Hadn't they told him that Gourry and Lina were engaged? They had, right? He felt the axis of the world shift under his feet as his brain tried to assimilate the hoped-for information, praying it wasn't a hallucination of the mind. If what she said was true...then...Lina was still free...

At that, his legs almost buckled underneath him. He couldn't believe it!

He wasn't too late.

Cradling his head within his palms, he asked in a small voice, "You're not married? You're not engaged? You don't have a boyfriend?" Lina caught the tiny spark of hope in his voice.

She shook her head violently from side to side, denying any such attachment. "No!" Carefully, she brought up, "Will you come back now and see the wedding?"

"...Yes..."

"Then you're not running away again?" she persisted. "You promise to stay till after the wedding?"

"...Yes..."

She gave a sigh of relief, and said shakily, "Hey, I told you that I could fix whatever was wrong, didn't I?"

A low, rumbling chuckle reverberated from his chest, much to Lina's delight. "And you were right," he smiled. Despite the lack of visibility, she could feel him smile, the happiness in his voice, and smiled back, knowing he'd feel it too.

"Let's go back to Sylphiel's," she grinned.

Hey baby I'm talking to you
Stop yourself and listen
Some things you can never choose
Even if you try, yeah
You're bangin' your head again
Cause somebody won't let you in
One chance...one love
Your chance to let me know

Fifteen minutes later, Zelgadis and Lina were back at Sylphiel's home. The bride-to-be welcomed them back with open arms, and Zelgadis apologized for worrying her, a small smile playing across his lips. The smile never left his face, and deepened whenever he glanced in Lina's direction, though the petite sorceress never noticed.

As evening fell, all the participants in the wedding prepared for the ceremony. Lina and Zelgadis went to their individual rooms and got dressed.

Zelgadis had just finished when a knock sounded on his door. He opened it up, to find Lina there, smiling radiantly up at him. He swallowed a gulp of surprise and stood out of the doorway to let her in.

As she swept gracefully into his room, he noted how good she looked. The pale pink dress hugged her breasts and waist, with an off-the-shoulder hemline, baggy, see-through sleeves cuffed tightly at her wrists. The dress flowed out at her hips till it reached her knees, exposing nicely slender, creamy legs. On her feet she wore matching pale pink high heels. Her long, fiery hair was left loose and trailed down her back in gentle waves, with her bangs framing her beautiful face. For once, she'd taken off her headband and the circular, golden earrings. Zelgadis thought her utterly beautiful.

"I came to see how you were doing with the clothes," she explained. "You didn't seem too thrilled to wear it before, so I came down just in case I needed to convince you into it."

Smirking, he replied, "Now I have no reason to hate wearing it, so I'm fine." He paused before saying, "You look good in that dress."

Lina stared up at him for a few moments before hastily averting her eyes, but not quickly enough to hide the blush staining her cheeks. "You...look good too," she complimented.

Indeed he did. The black tunic and pants were embroidered with gold and dark blue thread, and hugged his body to perfection, showing off the his narrow hips, his lean, muscled chest and arms, as well as everything from there on down, though she tried not to think about that too much... The finishing touches were the black cloak, and the two dark-brown belts at his waist. She dared to look back up at him as her blush faded from view.

Now her mind saw his handsome, light-blue face with the rocks surrounding his eyes, and lining his chin and cheekbone, as well as the light-violet hair glistening silver in the light. His blue eyes twinkled with a rare spark, and caught her in their depths.

She cleared her throat in an effort to recall her mind to the present. "Anyway, you look fine. I guess I should go," she said, trying to sound per functionary and businesslike. Just as she was reaching for the doorknob, his warm, strong hand clasped over her own, stopping her in her tracks.

"Lina...wait. I'd like to answer what I couldn't before," he blushed, turning her back around so she stared straight back into his eyes.

"Zel...what...?" she asked, confused yet hopeful. Her ruby eyes stared deeply into the depths of his sapphire blue eyes, hunting for what she longed to hear. Could it be...?

We can't go on
Just running away
If we stay any longer
We will surely never get away
Oo oo Never
Oo oo Never
We can't go on Never
We can't go on Never

"You asked me why I cried, why I ran away, and why I didn't want to see you marry Gourry. I couldn't answer those questions then, for I feared the answer would ruin your happiness. But now I can." He took her other hand within his own before continuing. "Lina, it all has a simple answer."

Gently, he leaned forward and pressed a slow, tender kiss on her lips. Lina felt her knees go weak beneath her as he did so, and became a little dizzy as the kiss impacted her senses.

"I love you," he whispered on a breath across her rosy lips, holding her hands against his chest.

For answer, she pressed her body closer to his and kissed him back. He grinned against her lips, a mingling of relief and utter joy, before applying himself to the pleasant task. His tongue darted across her lips, encouraging them to open up for him, and she readily did so. Immediately he plunged in, sipping the sweet nectar of her mouth as he'd longed to do for years on end, with only his dreams to comfort him. She intensified the kiss by mimicking what he did, and felt himself groan in pleasure against her.

Several minutes later, they broke off and came up for air, gasping and panting. Their arms were entwined around each other, pressing each other together as close as they could with the layers of clothing in-between them.

"I love you, Zel," she said at last, contentedly.

He smiled and hugged her tighter still. "I cried because I thought I'd lost you to Gourry, and I didn't want to see the woman I loved marry someone else, so I ran away. Does that answer your questions?"

"Thoroughly. Now stop talking and kiss me again," she requested impishly, eyes sparkling up at him.

Chuckling, he lowered his mouth again for a soul-searing kiss. Again, it was several minutes later before it ended. "Lina, will you marry me?"

"I'd be crazy to refuse!" she snorted, smiling happily.

He pulled away, despite the feelings telling him to stay in her arms, and said, "We'd better get down and meet up with Gourry. They're probably waiting for us."

She sighed in disappointment and nodded in agreement. "Yeah." Lifting her eyes to his again, she asked, "But we can come right back up here tonight?"

His answering impish grin was her response. "Of course."

Laughing, the two walked out of the bedroom to find the other engaged couple, their souls eternally changed because now they were twined together, never to be separated again.

**SONG by Heart

Previous (A Change of Fate) Next (Epilogue)

Go Back To Archive