Poison Chapter 8

Author: Tsutsuji Title: Poison

Poison

Chapter
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Title: Poison (ch. 8 of 11 or so)
Author: Tsutsuji
Date written: June-July, 2005
Rating: R-M (I think) for Lime.
Pairings: Zelgadis/Xelloss
Type: yaoi/slash, adventure
Warnings: hurt/comfort, angst, LIME - m/m sexual content
Disclaimer: I do not own the copyright to these characters and I'm making no profit from this fic and intend no copyright infringement.
Summary: It takes an angst-ridden Chimera to properly comfort a Mazoku when he's hurt...
AN: My continued thanks for all your reviews! Here it is, the pivotal chapter for the entire story...I hope it works!
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Zelgadis felt the touch on his cheek before he was fully awake. This time, when he opened his eyes to see Xelloss' violet gaze inches from his face, he wasn't surprised at all.
He'd fallen asleep earlier in his own bed, after watching Xelloss drift off into what appeared to be sleep, just as he had after the previous attack. He still didn't know if the Mazoku really needed to sleep or if it was just something to do while he waited for his strength to return. He had learned more about Mazoku today than he wanted to know, but there was still a lot that he didn't understand.
Zelgadis had climbed into his own bed on the other side of the room, but he hadn't expected to sleep even after their long day of travel. It seemed like he'd spent every minute of the day trying to decide what to believe. But in spite of the thoughts spinning in his head, he had fallen asleep quickly, only to wake up some time later with a Mazoku caressing his cheek.
He waited, but Xelloss only stared into his eyes, unblinking and unsmiling. He was leaning across Zelgadis with one arm on the other side of the bed, nearly on top of him. Zelgadis noticed for the first time that Xelloss' hand without his customary glove was surprisingly delicate. The touch on his cheek seemed light as a feather, yet he could feel it as distinctly as if his flesh was ordinary flesh. That one finger trailing so lightly over Zel's face was all; Xelloss didn't make any other move at all, except Zel thought he felt the arm across him tremble.
"Xelloss? Are you...?"
Xelloss shushed his question by pressing a fingertip over his lips. Then that delicate hand flowed lightly down over his chin, briefly fingering the rocky plates there before coming to rest around his throat. Thumb and fingers pressed softly over the pulse on either side of his neck, making him more aware of the pounding of his heart. He waited again, but for a long minute Xelloss did nothing else at all. Looking up into those half-lidded lavender eyes, Zelgadis started to feel nervous.
The corner of Xelloss' mouth lifted, just a little curve upward that Zelgadis could barely see in the dark. At the same time, a spark of heat touched his skin, as if Xelloss' fingertips had briefly burst into flame. He thought of the red-black energy that had burst from those hands to destroy a man in seconds, and nervousness blossomed into fear.
He hadn't even felt the expected rush of anger when he awoke to see Xelloss hovering over him, but this fear was just as strong. He wondered what Xelloss would do to arouse the darker emotions he needed, how far he would go to get them. Whatever he'd said earlier, it was clear that he still needed those emotions, and maybe needed them even more now to recover from the effect of the Soldiers' weapons. Anger wasn't the only thing he could draw power from. Fear and pain would work just as well.
Without thinking, Zelgadis slid his hand up to press against Xelloss' chest, fingers curling in the priest's shirt. But that might have been a mistake, he decided a second later, as it made him very aware of the body pressed so close to his. In spite of his fear, he wasn't sure if he was holding Xelloss off, or holding him in place.
Xelloss lowered his head a fraction of an inch closer, but no more. He was smiling a little more, now, and there was another quick burst of heat from the fingertips on Zel's throat that shot right through his stone skin. But Zelgadis couldn't tear his eyes away from those lips hovering so close to his. His wrist still tingled slightly where Xelloss had grabbed him earlier, and his heart pounded under that heated touch, but now it seemed that his own lips tingled as well from that kiss two days ago.
Still Xelloss didn't move and didn't do anything else. Zel's heart raced, but fear wasn't the only reason.
Finally damning caution for desire, he raised his head and touched their lips together. The response wasn't quite what he expected. Xelloss' eyes widened in surprise, and nothing else happened for a second. Then the violet eyes fell closed and Xelloss was on him.
Invading his mouth with lips and tongue, Xelloss held him down with the hand on his throat and pressed him into the mattress. The arm that had been stretched across Zel's chest now slipped under his shoulder and reached up behind his head. Xelloss caught a fistful of his wire-like hair in a grip that would have cut a normal man's hand to shreds.
Zelgadis pushed back against his chest, even though he couldn't budge Xelloss off him. He wasn't sure he wanted to. Xelloss rolled closer and thrust his knee between Zelgadis' legs to push them apart and trap them.
Suddenly Zelgadis felt very vulnerable, with Xelloss pulling his head back to ravish his mouth and pressing so aggressively against his body. With a grunt of fear he pushed back harder, but the only result was a soft laugh. Pinning him down with his body and holding his head with one hand, Xelloss moved the other hand down from his neck to slip under his nightshirt and push it out of the way. The delicate hand wandered over the smooth stone and rocky nubs on his chest, and all the while little flashes of flame-like energy glowed from his fingertips.
The pressure of those fingertips brought warmth that Zel hadn't felt in his skin since he'd become a chimera. Xelloss touched him like fire, and the sensation became a pleasure just short of being painful. The warmth shot through his body and gathered in his groin, which only resulted in making him feel even more vulnerable as his body started to respond in a way that would soon become obvious to his captor. Xelloss' mouth left his and started to search out all the other places that were still sensitive even on his stone body, beginning with the hollow of his throat and moving ever lower. The pleasant feeling he'd had when Xelloss touched him earlier was nothing compared to the electric tingle of hot tongue lapping his skin.
Zelgadis alternated between struggling and going limp under the pleasurable assault. When the heated touch and mouth delved below the sheet and started to push Zel's pants down his hips, it suddenly became clear what Xelloss' goal was. Zelgadis panicked. He growled and tried to grab Xelloss' hand away. It was bizarre enough that anyone would touch him at all in this way, but what Xelloss seemed determined to do horrified him even while he longed for it. They struggled for a minute, but somehow Xelloss managed to get Zel's pants out of the way and then pinned Zel's wrists at his sides.
Xelloss had been so strangely light when Zel had carried him earlier, but his weight now was more than enough to hold Zel down on the bed. Zel still squirmed under him, flushed with shame of his body and his response to Xelloss, hot with fear for his utterly vulnerable position. Glittering eyes caught his gaze, and he went still, feeling like a bird pinned under a cat's paw. He couldn't speak.
"Forgive me, Zelgadis-san," Xelloss murmured, looking down at Zel's exposed body. "I know you don't want this from me, that I'm the last person you would want touching you this way. But you see, if you did want it, it wouldn't be as much fun for me, would it?"
Zelgadis was startled by the sound of regret in his voice. Xelloss wasn't smiling now; in fact his half-lidded eyes seemed sad, if that was possible. Then he lowered his head and did what Zelgadis thought no one would ever do to him.
"Xelloss!" he cried out. Xelloss' incredibly hot mouth engulfed his erection; he felt like he would melt into a pool of lava on the spot. He wanted to speak or scream something more but he couldn't catch his breath. He wanted to let Xelloss know how much he wanted this, even though he was afraid and ashamed and even though he hated himself for wanting it so much. He had to let Xelloss know all that had awakened inside him from the moment of that first startling kiss.
Xelloss dragged waves of pleasure from him, even while keeping him helpless to either resist or cooperate. He'd never been so aroused - he'd never allowed himself to feel so aroused. Part of his mind screamed that it couldn't be right for him to feel this good, or for this horrible body to feel such pleasure.
Xelloss teased him mercilessly, sucking him to fullness, hungrily drawing more intense sensations from his body, then drawing back to let the tension build. Zel's frustration at being held down and manipulated grew even greater when he realized he wanted to reciprocate. He wanted to touch Xelloss and drive him to distraction just as he was being teased to madness.
As soon as he thought this, he realized how much he'd wanted it, and how long he'd been denying his desire. With that thought he realized how he could pleasure and torment Xelloss in his own way.
He started with the frustration, letting it grow into rage at his helplessness. Fear swelled into terror of his helpless position in Xelloss' hands. He let himself feel the thwarted desire he'd been hiding from himself until it was like a wordless scream in his mind. At the same time he reminded himself that this was a Monster touching him, and felt the revulsion of that along with the terrible desire.
He let the conflicted emotions build to an excruciating peak. Suddenly he drew them back and let pleasure rush through him in a wave of pure bliss. His choked scream became a gasp of joy. He held on to that ecstasy for a few intense seconds before releasing it, and then he let the darker emotions swell again.
He felt the hands pinning his wrists jerk. Xelloss paused and lifted his head, leaving Zel exposed and longing for more.
"Zelgadis?" He sounded breathless with surprise.
"Damn you, Xelloss!" Zelgadis cried, pouring all the anguish he could find inside himself into the words.
Xelloss shuddered; his eyes fell closed and a blissful smile appeared on his face. Panting with the force of his emotions, Zelgadis moaned when he saw that smile.
When Xelloss lowered his head and took him in again, he twisted Zel's wrists tighter than ever, painfully tight. Zelgadis strangled a scream and struggled under him, bucking his hips so his engorged cock thrust deep into Xelloss' welcoming mouth. The intense pain in his wrists was matched by the pleasure Xelloss forced upon him. It felt so good, but he shouldn't be able to feel this good. He was the one who was a monster, he thought desperately; a demon in an inhuman body. Only another monster would want him like this, could make him feel like this... He let all his revulsion for his body and his hatred of Mazoku gather inside himself. He heard and felt Xelloss moan in pleasure.
Suddenly his wrists were released and Xelloss' hands were around him and under him, lifting him up off the bed to feast on his body just as he was feasting on his dark emotions. Zelgadis felt like a powerful spell was ripping through him to do its work, but it felt even better because it stayed inside, spiraling tighter and tighter.
All the desire gathered into one place and was suddenly released. He poured himself into Xelloss, curling up around him, clawing at his shoulders, twisting his fingers in purple-dark hair. He didn't want to let go, even if Xelloss drained the life out of him.
Some time later, he slowly came to his senses. At first he was confused by a sense of contentment that he knew he shouldn't have. He couldn't remember why it was wrong to feel this good until he became aware of Xelloss' head resting on his chest. The pleasant feeling disappeared under a knot of conflicting emotions that he didn't try to sort out.
Xelloss' hair was as soft as he'd thought it would be, like heavy silk falling over his fingers. The hand that had touched him with fire now rested on his hip, a pleasant weight with only a little warmth left in it. But then Xelloss stirred and turned his head to press his lips against Zel's chest, and the soft heat of his kiss was like a touch of flame.
"All better now?" Zelgadis asked, without a touch of sarcasm.
Xelloss didn't turn to face him but rested his head on Zel again, rubbing his cheek over pebbled skin.
"A little," he said. "Actually, a great deal more than I expected. I wasn't really expecting this to give me strength, but you surprised me, Zel-san."
His answer confused Zelgadis. He raised his head to stare down at Xelloss.
"You didn't think it would strengthen you? Why did you bother, then?"
Xelloss turned and raised himself up over Zelgadis, and leaned over him so their faces were inches apart once again.
"I did it because I wanted to. I've wanted you like this ever since I first saw you, Chimera," he said.
Zelgadis gaped at him. That gave Xelloss the opportunity to dart down and tease Zel with lips and tongue for a few startling seconds before he rolled away and rose off the bed.
"Where are you going?" Zelgadis said, sitting up. He was beyond confusion. That wasn't what he'd expected to hear, and he didn't know if he wanted to believe it or not. He'd barely begun to come to terms with his own desire for Xelloss. That Xelloss might actually desire him as well was beyond the limit of belief.
"It's nearly dawn," Xelloss said. He sounded just as blandly cheerful as ever. "We should be on our way soon if we're going on to the Shrine. It's best if we avoid the crowds on the roads as much as possible, don't you think?"
Zelgadis couldn't even find it in himself to feel annoyed. If he felt anything at all it was relief. He was grateful for an excuse to step back from the storm of emotions that had built up and burst inside him. For the moment, at least, he'd reached the limit of knowing things he didn't want to know, feeling things he didn't want to feel, and trying to decide what to believe.
He quickly packed the few articles he'd taken out of his bag, while Xelloss gathered his bag, cloak, and staff and waited by the door. His head was bowed, hiding his eyes as usual, but he looked the same as ever, as far as Zelgadis could tell. It made him wonder what affect his emotional storm had really had. He'd assumed Xelloss was faking injury before; now he wondered if he was hiding greater weakness than Zel realized. He paused at the door and faced Xelloss. He paused at the door and faced Xelloss.
"Have you recovered from the attack?" he asked seriously. "Are you strong enough to go on now? I'm still not sure I understand what's happening to you." He paused uncertainly, and then rushed onward. "What we just did... did it really help? That's all I need to know."
Xelloss' lips twitched upward, but the rest of his face remained hidden.
"It did help," he said. "As I said, though, it has become increasingly difficult to draw strength from human emotions. Each time I do, the effect of the Curse grows stronger, so that the seal on my astral body grows stronger."
He cocked his head then, and Zel could see a glimpse of one violet eye.
"Your inhuman aspect counteracts that a little," Xelloss continued. "But even your emotions are like a seductive poison that I can't resist. It's rather like a hit from a drug that doesn't last as long as it did before and weakens the body each time it's used. Yes, I'm strengthened now, thanks to your inner turmoil, and I've recovered from the attack of those soldiers yesterday, for the most part. But I may not have much time to take advantage of it."
Zelgadis stared hard at him for another second. He understood the last of what Xelloss said, at least. Deciding what to believe about the rest could wait.
"In that case, let's get going," he said. He left the room and didn't look back.
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The clear sky over the valley was filled with light, but the sun hadn't yet risen when they came downstairs, looking for someone to settle their bill. Kari's husband was already on his way out the door to work in the gardens and greeted them cheerfully but quietly.
"Feeling better, Xelloss-sama?" he asked with a wide smile. Zelgadis was surprised at the question, but even more puzzled by the way it was asked. The man sounded as if he already knew the answer.
Xelloss said brightly that he was, thank you, and explained to Zelgadis' questioning look that he'd been feeling especially weary the night before after all the bright sun of the day.
Kari's husband pointed the way to the kitchen. "Kari'll figure your bill. Have a pleasant journey!" he said. He waved as he went out the door.
Kari was already busy chopping onions for the day's meals when they came into the kitchen. She asked Xelloss the same question with the same knowing look while she figured up what they owed for room and board.
"I'm glad to see you both looking better this morning," she went on, with an alarming twinkle in her eye. To Zelgadis' astonishment, she winked at them. "Some things Relics can't cure, neither can tonics or even sleep, eh? Should've seen you two just needed a bit of private time together to work out whatever was eating at the both of you. Good that the baby's a sound sleeper, and nothing wakes the bargemen after a day of work and a night of ale! I don't think anyone but Bri and me heard a sound, and that's just because we're such early risers."
Zelgadis looked at Xelloss uncertainly. He felt like he was missing something, but he wasn't reassured when even Xelloss looked stunned.
"You, uh, heard something?" Xelloss asked cautiously.
"Nothing I haven't heard before," she said brightly, "given the way those old bedsprings creak! I've heard a lot more than that, in fact. Sometimes the newlyweds come out here, thinking it'll be more romantic than the big places uptown, and you can hear them all up and down the canal!"
Realization of just what she'd heard hit Zelgadis like a Fireball. He felt his jaw drop, and his face flamed hotter than the fire in Kari's stove. It didn't help any that Xelloss had gone from looking alarmed to looking like Lina Inverse with a hoard of treasure at her fingertips. Zelgadis thought he would choke and die from embarrassment when Xelloss winked back at Kari.
"You're quite right, our time together here did us both a great deal of good!" he said cheerily. He cocked his head and winked at Zelgadis, revealing a glimpse of one inhuman eye that Kari couldn't see.
"My, Zel-kun," he said, "I don't think I've ever seen that particular shade of mauve on your face before!"
Zelgadis closed his eyes and hid his face behind his hand. He'd never felt so mortified, not even when he'd masqueraded all too successfully as a girl. That was nothing compared to knowing that a pair of innkeepers had overheard him and Xelloss having... having... doing what they'd just done together.
Xelloss pressed a handful of coins into Kari's hand without looking at the bill she'd written up.
"That's far too much, Xelloss-sama," she said quickly and tried to hand half of it back, but he stepped away, waving his hands at her.
"I insist!" he said. "Your hospitality is well worth it. Buy Duglas a drink on us, as well!"
She shrugged and laughed, pocketing the money without any further argument. She turned to Zelgadis and gave his arm a friendly nudge.
"Sorry if I've embarrassed you, Zelgadis-sama!" she said with a warm smile. "Nothing to be ashamed of!"
He sighed and pulled his hand away from his face, allowing himself to be reassured by her gleeful expression. No point in standing there dying of shame all day, he decided. Somehow he even managed to smile back at her.
"I'm sorry we, er, disturbed anyone," he said.
She laughed again. "I'm just glad you enjoyed your stay at our 'quiet, restful location'! Now, watch out for that sun out there in the Valley, Xelloss-sama," she warned. "There isn't a tree on the High Road between Midtown and the Crystal River, so you be careful!"
She held the kitchen door for them. They stepped out into a fresh morning and looked across the kitchen garden to the canal and the irrigated fields beyond. The nearly silent gurgle of the water and Bri's hoe hitting the dirt were the only sounds they could hear. Long morning shadows of the few trees beside the canal stretched up the Drover's Road, now pointing back toward the Haunted Ridge. But they turned to the other side where the city began. The bulk of Midtown's buildings in the sharp light looked like a pile of giant rock-golems dumped on the landscape.
As he stepped off the kitchen porch, Kari's last words gave Zelgadis an idea. He looked along the Drover's Road, shading his eyes against the sun. A barge was already moving away from the Inn's mooring dock, and a horse with a cart full of sacks came slowly up the road. Not far away, a smaller irrigation ditch drew water off the canal for a cherry orchard. He turned back to Kari who was waving goodbye from the doorway.
"How close would the Drover's Road take us to the Shrine City?" he asked. "Would it add much time to our journey to go that way?"
"It'll take you right up to where the canal joins Crystal River, by the docks in the old Jeweler's Town. That's right down under Shrine City, and from there you could take a ferry across to the Hill, or take the river road back down to where it joins the High Road. Would take you a little longer, but not much longer, if you're not in any hurry and you don't mind the company of farmers and bargemen. You should reach the Crystal River by nightfall, anyway, since you've got such an early start."
"We are in something of a hurry," he said with a glance at Xelloss. "But there's a little more shade, and it should be cooler along the canal. The heat on the High Road will slow us down just as much, if it wears you out like it did yesterday, Xelloss. Personally, I'd prefer to avoid the crowds. They find me a little too... interesting."
"Of course!" Xelloss agreed immediately. "What an excellent idea!"
Zelgadis thought of another thing and turned to Kari again. Xelloss waited, watching him curiously.
"I suppose," he said with a note of concern in his voice, "the Drover's Road is safe for strangers, isn't it? Those soldiers I saw uptown last night; do they patrol this far out?"
"Oh, them!" Kari said with a dismissive wave of her hand. "They don't even really patrol the High Road, as far as I've ever seen. They just take that road from the Shrine on their way out of the Valley. They don't do any policing, certainly not out in here on the edge of nowhere. They're only interested in hunting Mazoku, and those don't come around here at all!"
"That's good to know," he said, with a smirk at Xelloss, who beamed back at him as if this was the best news he'd heard all week.
"The glorious Soldiers of Shimer strut up the High Road after they've been dedicated at the Shrine just to be seen," she said, sounding unimpressed. "As far as I can tell, if you've seen one of them, you've seen them all. But you're safe enough on the Drover's Road. Bandits don't bother coming around here either, unless you count the kids who steal apples from the neighbors' orchard."
"Surely there are soldiers at Shrine City," Xelloss said, sounding like a curious tourist.
"They must guard the Shrine, at least."
"Not that I've ever heard," Kari answered. "Might be one or two around there for show, but I've never heard of there being any trouble for them to guard against. If bandits wanted to steal the Relics, the wouldn't have to go all the way to the Shrine to get them!"
"I see your point," Zelgadis said, and Xelloss nodded at her, beaming.
"Well, you two better be on your way, unless you want your room for another night!"
To Zelgadis' dismay, she actually wiggled her eyebrows at them suggestively, although her smile kept the gesture from being obscene. Still, it made him blush all over again. Kari caught Xelloss' eye.
"Cute when he blushes, isn't he?" she said with as much mischief as Xelloss himself.
"I've always thought so!" Xelloss replied. "Come, Zel-kun, let's be on our way!"
Zelgadis glared at him and gave Kari one last crooked grin before turning away and following Xelloss out of the yard.
They walked a while in silence, until Xelloss gave him a sly, sidelong glance.
"Zel-san, you were charmingly deceptive back there," he said. "Very clever of you!"
"I learned from the best," Zelgadis muttered, grinning to himself. He watched as a barge came drifting by, pulled by a pair of oxen plodding along the towpath on the opposite side of the canal. "You know, if you get tired of walking, Xelloss, maybe we can find a nice, grumpy bargeman to give us a ride."
"You are so considerate, Zel-san!" Xelloss said, beaming at him.
Zelgadis gave him a sly look from behind the silver fringe that hid half of his face. "That's how newlyweds are supposed to be, isn't it?" he said.
Xelloss' mouth dropped open in shock for a second, and then the Mazoku's laughter rang out in the still country air.
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to be continued!
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Next: A calm interlude before the final storm, as Zel and Xelloss take the scenic route to the Shrine City, and face the possibility that one of them might not return! (And later, Zelgadis learns a few other things he didn't know about Mazoku and their, er, sleeping habits.)

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