Changes - A Change of Fate

Author: Ashvolt Title: Changes - A Change of Fate

A Change of Fate
Lina puzzles...
By Ashvolt

Love comes, comes to take you
Love comes, it will awake you
Love comes and grows
And love survives

Lina glanced once toward the door that had just been knocked upon, and went back to gazing at the streets. For a moment, out of the corner of her eye, she thought she'd seen that familiar ivory cloak belonging to a pale blue chimera, but as she looked back out, the figure was gone just as suddenly as he'd appeared, and she cursed. If it had been Zelgadis, he probably wouldn't ever think of stopping to greet his old friends. Never mind how much they'd gone through together.

Her mind turned back to three years ago. After Copy Rezo, they split up again. Amelia went back to Seyruun with her father, Prince Phil, and Zelgadis parted from them again claiming the need to look on his own for a cure. But, that night before he left, Lina stayed up and talked softly with him over a crackling campfire as Gourry snored in the background.

You can run
Far from where you found me
You can hide from the one
Who wants inside your soul
Turn your back I'll be behind you
I'm in love and I will find you

"What will you do now, Zelgadis?" Lina asked quietly, staring intently into the flames.

"Probably check out some libraries on magic," he shrugged calmly. "What about you?"

"I heard of a hidden treasure somewhere near here. I might as well try and find it," was her dull response.

"Is Gourry going with you?" he asked, betraying no hint of emotion in his voice. She tried to detect any happiness, sadness, or anger, but couldn't hear a single thing through the emotional mask he wore. Silently, she cursed his ability to hide his feelings so well. It was so damn annoying!

Stifling the irrational anger, she looked up at his face. Zelgadis had his eyes trained stoically on the distant landscape in front of him, as if searching for something there. She doubted he saw her looking at him, the way he was concentrating. Not for the first time, she noticed his lean, handsome face, his sapphire-blue eyes. Quickly, she looked away again, down at the ground. "I guess so. He'd tell me if he was staying here in Sairaag with Sylphiel."

Painful silence stretched between them. Not able to stand it anymore, Lina said in a confiding whisper, "It's going to be different not having you around. You're always a great help, both in and out of battle, and I know I can trust you. Now I'll have to rely on Gourry."

To her surprise, Zelgadis turned quickly and looked at her. "You mean, you'll miss me?" he wondered, as if this were a foreign concept to him. "Why?" he asked, plainly confused. "I look like a monster!"

Her anger returned full force at his comment. "What the hell are you talking about?!" she shouted heatedly. "Of course I'll miss you! You're a friend! And you've never been a monster, you idiot." He still looked surprised, and quite stubborn. The stupid guy didn't want to believe people could like him no matter what he looked like. Sighing in frustration, she bopped him on the head. "Ow!" Sheepishly, she massaged her throbbing hand. She'd forgotten how hard his skin was again.

It was his turn to sigh in frustration. "Now who's the idiot?" he asked wryly, taking her bruised hand within his own and chanting the word, "Recovery." Quickly, the pain subsided and her head went back to normal.

She snatched her hand away from his grasp as if he'd burned it instead of healed it, and glared at him. What surprised her was the low rumble of laughing that came from his mouth. She felt her temper cool because of the rare sound, and let herself enjoy it. It was so rare to hear him laugh, and she had made it one of her goals in life to remedy that. Although she'd had limited success, she was the only one so far who had even mildly succeeded.

"Thank you, Lina," he said, smiling as his chuckles dies down.

"For what?" she inquired, smiling warmly back at him.

"For forgetting what I am. For saying I'm your friend. For treating me how you would everyone else," he smiled, blue eyes twinkling merrily.

They'd gone to be soon after, and she'd slept the whole night through. But, in the morning when she automatically turned and looked for him, she saw his things were gone, and he was nowhere to be seen. At that moment, seeing how he'd disappeared as if he'd never been there to begin with, she realized just how important he had become in her daily life. She thought determinedly, Someday, someday, I'll see him again, and then I won't ever let him go.

Deny
That I really know you
That's a lie
I can see the truth
You need me there beside you
Feel my arms reach out to guide you

Another knock pounded on the door, interrupting her thoughts. She grumbled and shouted irritably to the back of the house, "Isn't anyone going to answer that?"

There wasn't an answer, and Lina concluded they were out of hearing range. That meant she'd have to answer the door.

Grumbling grumpily at the inconvenience, she stocked up to the door and threw it open, intending to give the unfortunate person a piece of her mind for interrupting her thoughts. The intention flew from her mind when she saw who was standing on the other side.

Her eyes widened in shock, and her mouth parted in a small, inarticulate gasp. The figure stared down at her, blinked, clearly as shocked as her, and smiled warmly.

"Zelgadis?!" she cried as she came out of her temporary stupor. "What're you doing here?!"

"I..." he began, becoming nervous. A blush stained his cheeks.

A cheerful, kind voice interrupted them. "Zelgadis! I didn't think you'd received the invitation to the wedding! Glad you came!" Gourry greeted, smiling as he came near and stood just behind Lina. She barely noticed his presence.

"...Wedding?" Zelgadis said in a suspiciously bland voice. He looked from Lina to Gourry, and back again. Watching him carefully, Lina briefly saw the mask drop, and pain, anguish, and despair clouded his eyes. A second later, the mask of calm neutrality appeared back over his features, and Lina found herself blinking in confusion, wondering if she'd actually seen the pain on his face. "Congratulations. I...just came to wish you two luck," he said after a moment, although the emotionless voice belied his words.

"Thank you, but you have to stay for the wedding tomorrow evening! You're my best man, you know," Gourry chided, stepping in front of Lina and putting his hand on his friend's shoulder, drawing him into the house.

"But...but..." Zelgadis sputtered, trying to draw back out the door.

Lina shook her head to clear it of the cobwebs and smiled mischievously at the chimera who so obviously wanted to go. "Aww, but Gourry would be so hurt if you didn't stay for the wedding! Isn't that right, Gourry?" she grinned teasingly.

For once, Gourry grasped what she was doing, and said, "Yeah, Zel! You have to stay now."

"See?" Lina gloated in triumph, and grabbed onto Zelgadis's arm before he could bolt for the door in a last desperate attempt to get away. He looked from Gourry to Lina, and sighed in resignation.

"I'm not leaving, am I?" he said gloomily.

"Nope!" agreed Lina gleefully. "Come on; I'll show you to your room, and the outfit you're supposed to wear for the wedding." She almost missed the pain that flashed briefly across his face at the mention of the wedding, and wondered at it. With effort, she pushed it to the back of her mind to be studied later.

Love comes, comes to take you
Love comes, it will awake you
Love comes and grows
And love survives

It was thirty minutes later, and Zelgadis had been given a grand tour of Sylphiel's new home. He'd also been told where everyone's room were, and that Sylphiel herself was out doing last-minute shopping for the wedding, so she wouldn't be home till later that night.

Zelgadis stared at the clothes he was supposed to wear for the wedding in morbid curiosity. He hadn't had the courage to tell them the real reason he'd appeared on the doorstep, or that he hadn't known about the wedding.

A crystalline tear slipped unnoticed from his right eye and shattered on the floor at his feet.

His change of heart had come too late, and the worst possible scenario was coming true. Gourry and Lina were getting married, and he was supposed to be their best man. It was quite an ironic twist of fate, if he did say so. He was going to be at the alter with her, yet she was marrying someone else. Who said fate didn't have a sense of humor?

Another tear slipped out unbidden. He caught it deftly in his hands, and studied the clear drop of stone bleakly. More tears followed, and as he leaned his head over the bed, he wept silently. Although he didn't quite dare to sob, he desperately wanted to wail out his grief into the air for all to hear. But, he knew someone would hear and ask him what was wrong, and he knew he couldn't quite tell them the reason for his tears. He couldn't tell them he'd originally come here to...

He forced himself to stop nine tears later, and gathered the small horde of precious stones into his hands. An idea came to him of a possible gift for the couple. Tears like this were some of the rarest jewels in the world, and prized, because each droplet held a fragment of a memory, an idea, or a dream that the creator felt. It was almost like he had painted the inside of the jewels with something from himself. Knowing what he'd been crying about, he didn't quite dare look at what they new contained. He'd been thinking about Lina and him, their past, the present, their future...and his wishes for what the future would be...

Carefully, he slipped them into a pouch and put a spell of protection over them. That done, he walked from his room and down the stairs, unconsciously pulling his hood back on. He thought, Lina and Gourry's love has survived and grown, if they're getting married. I hope she's happy.

Need me
Like an ocean needs a river
You need me
Like the river needs the rain
You need me
To come and fill you
Don't let indecision kill you

Lina saw him on the stairs, and smiled up at him. He glanced in her direction, and she saw a suspicious pink lighten his cheeks for a moment before it was ruthlessly suppressed.

"Hey, Zel," she greeted casually, as if they'd never been apart.

"Hey. Where's Gourry?" he asked curiously. He would have expected them to be together as much as possible.

Shrugging, she responded uninterestedly, "I don't know. He's probably practicing his lines, since I warned him that he couldn't forget them during the ceremony."

"I...see.." he said, almost choking on the words. Was he going to survive till after the ceremony? Could he see her in the arms of another man, see her be kissed by someone other than himself?

Yes, but his already cracked heart would shatter into a million pieces when he did see it. There was no way he'd stick around to see that. Tonight, he would have to leave, or risk becoming a broken man. But, before then, he had a present to get made...

She saw the pain flash across his face for a third time, and felt her soul respond. What happened to him while she wasn't there to protect him? He'd already gone through some much; he didn't deserve this.

Something occurred to her about then. Zelgadis was incredibly adept at hiding his emotions, and he didn't willingly let his feelings show. Even if he was in great pain, he'd hide it. But Zelgaids had shown her a deep pain lingering in his soul three times, and hadn't been able to mask it from showing. That would mean the feelings were very, very strong...

What had happened? What was so bad he couldn't hide it from her?

She resolved to find out as soon as possible. Perhaps she could help ease whatever was causing it.

"Where're you going?" she asked. Maybe she could get him to talk to her if they walked together for awhile...

"Nowhere," he frowned, but she'd seen a pouch hanging on his belt, and how his hands had instinctively moved to cover it from view.

"Oh? Then what's that?" she demanded impishly.

"None of your business," he snorted, crossing his arms.

She grinned evilly and said distinctly, "Then I'll have to find out on my own!"

His eyes widened and he dashed down the stairs to the front door, with Lina in hot pursuit. Deftly he swung the door open, never pausing in stride, and ran out into the open air. Bearing to the left, he ran behind the home to the backyard, and came to a screeching halt when he saw Lina running toward him.

Her fingers reached for the little pouch. Strong, lean fingers clasped around her own and pulled them away. She looked up at Zelgadis, who held them in his hands, amused and annoyed at the same time. Her ruby eyes widened when she saw the tell-tale blush creeping over his cheeks.

"Zel...?" she asked hesitantly, unsure what this meant.

Abruptly he dropped her hands and brushed by her, heading quickly to the front of the home and down the road to town without another word. She stared after him for a long time, again wondering what had happened. He needed her as a friend and companion again, though, that much was clear. It also made her wonder whether she should tell him...

He was back, so why keep it from him? It might be the last chance she had to tell him...

Still...

Love comes, it comes to take you
Love comes, it will awake you
Love comes and grows
Love survives

That night, Zelgadis returned from the jewelers. They had done a rush job using magic, skill, and spells galore to speed up the process, but at the same time create fantastic works of art. It had cost him a king's ransom, but it was worth it. Two crystal tears were set into gold for the earrings, five were used on a gold necklace, and the last for were used on a bracelet. They were perfectly exquisite in every detail; he'd made sure of that.

His gifts to Lina were done, and now he could leave, once and for all. After this, he'd take pains never to see her again. It would be like a knife in his heart every single time he saw her together with Gourry, and he knew he couldn't survive many of those wounds, even if he did have stone skin.

Silently, he slipped the magnificent jewelry into another pouch, this one black with gold embroidery of a phoenic at the top, and pulled the top shut using the golden rope inside the hemline.

He stared at it, as if he could still see the contents, and closed his eyes for a moment. Then, shaking his head to clear it, he turned and slipped silently out onto the balcony. From here he could jump straight onto Lina's balcony, which was just beneath his own. It made things very convenient.

Carefully, he leaped off and grabbed hold of the railing, using his arms to swing himself onto Lina's balcony without a sound. He waited a few seconds to see if Lina happened to wake up, but nothing stirred from within her room. He gave a sigh of relief.

Sliding the balcony door open revealed Lina curled up in her bed, a child-like innocence on her face that rarely appeared when she was awake. He gave an unconscious smile at the sight, eyes softening kindly, and approached her. Tenderly, he brushed a lock of hair away from her face, and caressed her cheek.

"Lina...be happy...with Gourry..." he whispered so low he was sure only he could hear it.

He jerked his hand away when he heard her moan softly, and say longingly, "Zelgadis..."

Before she could wake up, he settled the pouch onto her nightstand, along with a short note he'd made, and slipped out her door. Stealthily, he walked down the stairs toward the front door.

"Zelgadis, where are you going?" a warm, cheerful voice asked innocently.

He stopped in his tracks when he heard Sylphiel, and cursed. He'd almost made it...almost been to the door... Obviously fate hadn't had enough fun at his expense yet. "Hello, Sylphiel. I haven't seen you in awhile."

She smiled and nodded, pointing to a seat across from her. "Sit down and I'll make you a cup of tea."

There was no polite way to refuse, and he felt strangely reluctant to leave yet, so he agreed. Soon he had a steaming cup of tea in his hands, and she was sitting across from him, also with a cup of tea sitting before her.

Delicately, Zelgadis asked, "So, how are the plans for the wedding coming?"

"They're done, for the most part. It's so exciting!" she giggled, smiling prettily.

He sighed and set down his cup. "Sylphiel...why...why did you agree to hold the wedding here?" he asked, studying the table as if it were intensely fascinating all of a sudden.

"Because Gourry-sama thought it would be a good idea," Sylphiel said, sounding a little puzzled.

"Weren't you...offended?"

"No. If Gourry-sama wanted to hold the wedding here, I wasn't about to refuse him," she smiled guilelessly.

Zelgadis looked up, and asked sympathetically, "You still love Gourry a lot to agree to this, don't you?"

This puzzled poor Sylphiel even further. "Of course I love him," she frowned, her confusion showing in her eyes.

Zelgadis looked away again. "I...I didn't know about the wedding when I came here," he admitted. "I came her for...another reason." He squeezed his eyes shut and said hoarsely," I was too late." He took a steadying breath and opened his sapphire blue eyes again. Sylphiel saw the mental pain hidden deep in their depths, and let out an involuntary gasp. Not seeming to hear her, his mouth twisted into a mocking, and he said, "I'm leaving before...before I have to see something I didn't ever want to see. It'll be better on all sides."

Tenderly, Sylphiel laid a hand on his and whispered, "I'm sure everything will be alright if you just wait and see. Please stay for the wedding."

Bitterly, Zelgadis laughed and raised his face to look at her. This time the pain wasn't hidden; it was in plain view, and it just about broke her heart. "But Sylphiel, that's what I don't want to see."

He got up and walked toward the door, but paused as soon as he had opened it and said casually, all his pain hidden away again under a stone mask, "I'll be at the inn closest to you. If I'm needed for some reason, besides being Best Man, check for me there." And he walked out into the night.

Sylphiel stared after him, very confused. What wouldn't he want to see at the wedding?

Perhaps she'd better talk to Lina. Lina was smart, and would know what he meant.

Love comes and it may scare you
Love comes and it will dare you
Love comes and grows
Love survives

A knock reverberated on Lina's bedroom door, and she groaned as it came again. What time was it, anyway? She looked at the sun's position and shook her head. Seven in the morning? Grr...she'd been hoping to sleep in later than that!

"Go away!" she shouted irritably in the general direction of the door.

The door opened, and in came a worried Sylphiel. "Lina? Can I talk to you?"

"Didn't you just hear? I told you to go away, not enter!" Lina shouted, readying a flare arrow in her hands.

"Wait, wait! Lina, it's important! It has to do with Zelgadis!" Sylphiel said as she hastily backed up to the doorway again, hands held in front of her as if to ward off Lina's attack.

The flare arrow died as fast as it had appeared. "Wh-what?" she frowned, confused. "What's that foolish chimera done now?"

Breathing a sigh of relief inwardly, Sylphiel approached the fiery sorceress again and sat on the end of the bed. As Lina listened, Sylphiel recounted everything that had happened last night.

At the end, Lina was as puzzled as Sylphiel. "What did he mean, 'I was too late?' He was too late for what?" she asked, frowning delicately.

"I don't know," sighed Sylphiel.

"It's just that...why wouldn't he want to see Gourry marry you?" Lina asked. "I thought he'd be happy to see you and Gourry finally get together."

Sylphiel blushed prettily at the mention of her dear Gourry.

Lina smiled for a moment before she recalled something else. "Wait a minute...you said he hadn't heard of the wedding, right? It was just an accident he came here just as you two were about to get married. Did you, or anyone else, ever tell him it was Gourry and you that got engaged?" At Sylphiel's hesitant shake of the head no, Lina groaned and covered her face with her hands. "Last time he saw me, he might have mistaken Gourry and I as being more than just good friends. He could have thought, all this time, that I was marrying Gourry, and not you, if no one told him otherwise. Gourry was with me at the door when it was announced to Zelgadis that Gourry was about to be married, and I think he thought Gourry meant me as his bride. It wasn't ever clearly said who the bride was, since we all assumed he knew. Oh no..."

Sylphiel gasped and covered her mouth with one hand in surprise. "Oh my! It would fit with what he said!"

"But...in that case...why wouldn't he want to see me marry Gourry?" Linas frowned, thinking.

"I...I don't know," Sylphiel admitted.

Lina glanced over at her nightstand, looking for her headband and earrings. That was when she saw the note, and the black pouch. On the front of the note was written simply, "Lina."

With a deep sense of foreboding, she opened the letter up and read.

Lina,
I hope Gourry and you will be happy once you two are married. I know of no one else who deserves love more than you do. Please accept these jewels; their very uniqueness fit you as nothing else could.
--Zelgadis

Lina put the letter aside and slowly, carefully opened the pouch. She reached inside, and pulled out some of the most expensive and lovely jewels she'd ever seen. They were crystal tears, and worth a king's ransom. She gasped, and laid a hand lightly on one tear. A memory shot into her head at the simple touch. She was about to be killed by a troll when he hacked through the monster, killing it. Hastily, she backed up to him and put her hands around his waist for protection. He repressed an unbidden shiver of pleasure at the touch and focused on the battle at hand.

Lina shook her head, clearing it of the sudden memory, and realized she'd seen it from Zelgadis's point of view, not her own. But, what really got her was the realization that he liked her touch.

She had to see him, and at least explain that it was Gourry and Sylphiel who were engaged, not Gourry and her. So... "Sylphiel, I'll find Zelgadis and explain everything. You stay here and get really for tonight," Lina said distractedly, already getting up and pulling on clothes.

"...Okay," nodded Sylphiel.

Fifteen minutes later, Lina was running down to the nearest inn, for she knew she had to let that silly chimera know her fate could still change, if he'd just let her in.

She ran into the inn, panting, and walked up to the innkeeper. "Is Zelgadis staying here?" she asked. Quickly, she fumbled out a few coins and pressed them into the innkeeper's outstretched hand.

"Zelgadis? Yeah, he's here. He's in room ten," the innkeeper nodded solemnly.

"Thank you," she smiled, and looked for the room Zelgadis was supposed to be staying in. It didn't take her long to find it.

She gulped nervously, thought, It is time, and knocked...

**SONG by Kate Wolf

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