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Author:
Xellas M |
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Exposed Exposed
Part 3 by Xellas
M. Zelgadis
sprinted towards his physical body, pressing the pace until he was running
alongside Himitsu. As he ran, the images and memories recently released
by Xellos began to reassemble themselves in his mind like a large and
complicated puzzle. Guilt was one of the few negative emotions the
depressed chimera had seldom dealt with up to this point, one that he had
rarely felt applied to him. However, when the last piece snapped into
place Zelgadis was cursed with a single moment of complete clarity. He
understood what had been done to him and why. Even worse, he understood
how it had been able to succeed. That
demon, that repulsive, conniving bastard of a Mazoku had actually loved
him. In allowing Zelgadis to get close, Xellos had left himself open for
attack. They
returned to the chimera’s rooms without incident and Zelgadis wasted no time
returning to his body. Mechanically, he washed, changed and ate, but the
food tasted like ashes. The agony
Xellos had inflicted on him in the Astral plane was nothing compared to the
shaman’s betrayal. Zelgadis
had always been scornful of suicides, despising them as weak and selfish.
The very idea of giving up turned his stomach. Now the only thing that
prevented him from finding a way to open his veins was the knowledge that it
would only compound his error by sealing his beloved’s fate. It didn’t
matter anyway, the shaman decided; Xellos would probably do the good deed
himself once he was free. He
realized that every minute he spent wasting time feeling sorry for himself was
another minute Xellos would suffer. Quickly, he finished eating and set
out to find the priest’s jeweled staff. * * * * * Something
had been wrong with today’s session, leaving Mirelle both exhausted and in a
foul mood. Her advisors gave her a very wide berth, coming up with a wide
and extremely creative variety of excuses that would take them pointedly
elsewhere. Alone with
her thoughts, Mirelle growled her frustrations to her mirror. Xellos had
to be drawing strength from somewhere, but where? He should have nearly
been broken by now, but it still felt like he was holding something back.
He still had too much strength left. The Mazoku must be drawing power
from somewhere, even though she had been very careful to personally remove any
item of even questionable potential from his possession. The dragon
shuddered, remembering that search. The feeling of Xellos’ filthy Mazoku
hide had brought back too many repressed memories. What she
needed to do was get the Mazoku off balance, force him to make a mistake.
As luck would have it, she had the perfect tool already to hand. The
imbalanced dragon smiled charmingly at her reflection. It was a good
thing she hadn’t had Zelgadis killed, after all. * * * * * The
chimera in question was actually still in his quarters when the summons
came. He had been carefully planning his search for Xellos’ staff;
fortunately, all that time spent looking for the Claire Bible had given him a
lot of practice looking for highly magical artifacts. He was just about
to begin his search when Himitsu growled softly, then literally
disappeared. One second he was there, the next…gone. Zelgadis
started. He had been beginning to suspect that the blue cat was more than
he seemed to be and this pretty much clinched it. He wondered as he
quickly hid his papers. A soft knock sounded at his door. Before
the shaman could even get up to open it, it was pushed open and a smiling
figure entered. It was the
same Ryuzoku soldier that had mocked him after they had taken Xellos. Her
human form was short for a dragon, her features slightly masculine beneath
cropped blond hair. Without bothering to try to cover it up, she
appraised the shaman openly, lewdly. Her words were polite but her tone
contemptuous and suggestive all at once as she finally announced “Mirelle-sama
would like to see you now, if you have a minute.” He wanted
to hit her. Hell, he wanted to kill her. She had been turned
on by his humiliation and didn’t even think enough of him as a sentient being
to try to hide it. In some ways, she was just as bad as the one who had
used him in the first place. Still, he had to keep up the act, at least
until Xellos was free. “That’s wonderful…do I look alright?” He was
proud of himself. He had managed to keep his teeth from clenching
together as he said it. The
Ryuzoku’s grin widened. “You look delicious. I’m off duty tonight,
when she’s finished maybe we can get together. It’s not like you have anything
else to do.” The bitch actually laughed. Zelgadis
could feel his skin darken with anger as he stammered his reply. “W-we’ll
see.” Hopefully she would put it down to shyness. * * * * * By the
time the pair was standing before the door to Mirelle’s office, the soldier had
introduced herself as Irene and arranged to see him later that evening.
The way she stared at him as she said goodbye reinforced the feeling that he
would never be clean again. The
chimera couldn’t manage a smile, so he simply nodded as he opened the
door. Fear flooded through him. If he couldn’t handle the
attentions of someone only marginally involved with this nightmare, how was he
ever going to face its author? If Mirelle noticed the change, where would
that leave Xellos? It was too
late to avoid this meeting. If he left now, he may as well just give up,
which was not an option until the Mazoku was set free. Perhaps, if he
were really alert, he might find a clue to the missing staff. Taking one
last deep breath, he entered. Mirelle’s
office was shockingly spartan. No personal effects were visible anywhere,
only a square, functional desk with uncomfortable looking chairs on either
side. There were no windows. The sole source of light was a harsh
white light spell in the center of the ceiling. It reminded him of the
dreams the dragon lady had used in his conditioning and he was unable to
completely repress a shudder of fear. “Good
evening, Zelgadis! I hope everything is going well, that you are
comfortable.” Everything
depended on this. The shaman was not about to let Xellos down. He
managed to smile even though it hurt to do so. “Very comfortable, Lady. I
only regret that I cannot be of further help.” “Did you
enjoy that Mazoku so much?” Mirelle teased lightly. This was
going to be even harder than he had thought. Tension set in the chimera’s
stony shoulders even as his stomach rolled and he found himself entirely unable
to reply. Fortunately,
the dragon seemed ready to put his reaction down to embarrassment. “I am
sorry, Zel-chan, I couldn’t resist.” She smiled. “We do appreciate
your sacrifice, very much so.” Zelgadis
nodded, still unable to speak. He had always hated being called Zel-chan
and it sounded worse coming from the one personal enemy he had since Rezo. “Please,
sit down.” The lovely blonde indicated the seat before her desk. Stiffly,
Zelgadis complied. ‘Cold,’ he reminded himself ‘I have to make myself
believe what I am saying.’ Finally,
the shaman trusted his voice enough to speak. “How are things
going? Have you gotten what you wanted from it yet?” Mirelle
sighed. “No, and that’s what I wanted to talk with you about. I
think you can help.” Like
hell! “What do you need?” “He is
proving very…resilient. Too resilient. Something is going
wrong. I’ve tripled the guard on him and strengthened all my wards, but I
cannot find the problem. I am hoping that if you confront him, he might
make a mistake. We’re so close!” Zelgadis’
mind spun. The image of a poor, beaten little girl flashed through his
mind and he barely suppressed an outbreak of sheer panic. He couldn’t do
that again! Watch helplessly while another suffered because of him.
There had to be a way out of this, there just had to. ‘Information!
Don’t panic until you get more information’, he said to himself. “I would
be honored. When do you need me?” “I need to
get some rest, first. Dawn tomorrow will do perfectly.” She
replied. It was true. The Ryuzoku looked tired and if it was visible
in her human form, she must be truly exhausted. “Very
well. Please do get some sleep. I hate to think of you becoming
ill, working so hard for all of us. The entire world will thank you one
day.” That only left him with a single night to find the staff and come
up with a plan, but it was better than nothing. Mirelle
smiled. “That’s very sweet of you, Zel-chan. I will see you in the
morning, then.” It was
clearly a dismissal, but an idea halted Zelgadis just before he reached the
door. “Lady?” Clearly
impatient, the golden dragon nevertheless smiled as she replied “Yes?” “I was
wondering…It…Xellos…had a staff. I think I would like it as a reminder,
if you don’t mind. Something to keep alive the memory of how you saved
me.” His heart pounded as he awaited her response, afraid that he was
pushing it too far, that she would discover his real reason for asking. Curiosity
and calculation flashed across her countenance, but no suspicion. “Of
course…” she muttered, mostly to herself. “None of us can use it,
but…” She looked carefully at the shaman, then nodded. Raising her
voice, she said “You probably don’t even know this, but that staff is an
incredibly powerful weapon. None of us can wield such an unclean thing, but
you as a baser creature might be able to.” She rose and waved her hand in
a complicated gesture that Zelgadis couldn’t quite follow and suddenly held the
staff out to him. Trembling,
he reached out and took it. The wood felt warm beneath his hands; the red
jewel flashed once in acknowledgement. He wanted to smile, to laugh out
loud, but he didn’t dare. Silently, he bowed and exited the room. * * * * * Zelgadis
went directly back to his room only to find Himitsu had returned and was
staring at him in expectation. The cat made one soft, low purr of
greeting. The shaman nearly dropped the staff he was clutching in
surprise when it vibrated softly in response. “What?” he
yelped in surprise. “Careful!
I’m not exactly a piece of firewood, you know…” The voice was sarcastic. It
couldn’t be. No way. Zelgadis decided that everything he had been
through had finally driven him insane. After all, every rational person
knew that cats did not converse with staves. Further, he was almost
positive that staves never, ever made derisive comments to chimeras. “That’s
because talking to certain chimeras can be an awful lot like talking to stone
walls.” The voice replied. “That’s
not funny.” Better to just live with it and respond until he woke up in a
nice hospital somewhere. “Neither
is this situation. Xellos-sama is in serious trouble. Oh, he says
to tell you ‘Hi’. Normally, he would have told me to destroy you for
touching me but I figure he must have his reasons. He usually does, you
know.” “I know…wait!
You can talk with him? Is he alright?” Several emotions came
crashing down on Zelgadis at once: fear, that Xellos was hurt beyond
repair, guilt because it was his fault, and hope because they now had a chance
to survive. “I can
communicate with him, but it drains him. To answer your second question,
I guess it depends on what *your* definition of alright is. He’s very
weak, starving. He doesn’t have enough energy left to break that barrier,
even with my considerable help.” Despair
reached over and pushed all other feelings aside. “Isn’t there anything I
can do? I fed him before, I know I did…” “You can
feed him through me. All you have to do is find a victim and torture it
while holding me - golden dragons are my favorite, but in a pinch like this I
won’t be picky. I can store its negative energy until you give me back to
Xellos-sama.” There was
no way Zelgadis was going to refuse. * * * * * Several
hours passed spent in careful preparation for what the shaman now had to
do. He had obtained magically enhanced restraints easily enough.
His request was barely even questioned, an unexpected side benefit of the
training he had received before being used on Xellos. It was just assumed
that someone else was taking him on as a plaything. The chimera had also
very carefully soundproofed his room He knew he
was about to give up something very important, something he would never get
back. Briefly he wondered if this was what women felt before losing their
virginity. The last of his innocence, like the illusions of Justice that
were Amelia’s very breath, was about to be gone and he would never get it
back. Although in the past he had inflicted more pain than was necessary
in battle and enjoyed it, like when he had captured Lina Inverse, he had
considered what he was about to do beneath him. Zelgadis told
himself repeatedly that the dragon soldier had this coming for her part in this
whole horrible situation. Deep down he knew better. When this was
all over, he would be no better than any Mazoku. In the end
it didn’t matter because he wasn’t going to stop. He didn’t even want
to. Xellos was too closely within his grasp. The
unsuspecting Ryuzoku arrived, right on time. Luring Irene into his trap
was amazingly easy; she actually thanked him for not making her waste her time
in any kind of courtship ritual. Neither did she balk when he asked her
to put on the restraints. She completely believed his explanation that he
was afraid she would resume her dragon form during their coupling and hurt
him. Lust lit her eyes as she stared, bound and helpless, at her toy. Showtime. Zelgadis
held his victim’s gaze as he reached under his cloak for Xellos’ staff “*Very*
nice choice, no wonder the Master likes you.” The red orb began pulsing,
blood red light filling the chamber as the magical item was reluctantly forced
to voice its approval. “Shut
up. What do I do now?” This wasn’t the time to play games, not when
the chimera was on the edge of doing something so frightening. The bound
Ryuzoku’s eyes widened. Her intended lover was talking to a piece of
wood! Much too late, she began to get the idea that something here was
very wrong. “Absolutely
delicious, in fact.” Xellos’ staff ignored its temporary wielder as it
continued its praise. It said no more, only increased the speed of its
pulsing light. Zelgadis shivered as he began to feel dark energy coursing
through his veins. This was so much different from his own magic!
It was hate and pain, despair and fear. It was the other side of
existence, the part of a soul that reacts with unmitigated pleasure to the
sight of blood and the sound of crying. It sliced through his mind in a
manner that was pure ecstasy. The shaman
was utterly seduced by the darkness. Denial, so important in enabling the
civilized to ignore the primitive urge to hurt, to kill, was swept away under
its influence. He was ready to do this. He was going to enjoy it. He could
not have said how he did it, but instinctively he grabbed the energy, shaped it
and held it in his hand. Looking down at the now whimpering blonde
dragon, so helpless, he whispered softly, “You are lost, gone, beautiful
one. So very sad, a life like yours was meant to last.” “Please,
don’t. I’ll do anything you want. I don’t want to die.
Please!” The innocent victim was crying now, begging her stone captor for
mercy. What
little mercy he had, Zelgadis gave. He began immediately. He
released the energy, binding it around the weeping female, tying intricate knots
of hot pain over her body. Stronger,
he was getting stronger every minute. The body beneath him was screaming
and jerking, unable to find release in unconsciousness. Zelgadis moaned
at the sight, at the taste of his victim’s fear. It was exquisite.
The chimera experimented with the pain, increasing it ever so gradually, then
allowing his victim a single moment of relief before resuming at an even more
excruciating level. He did not
have too long to play, the staff kindly reminded him, so finally the chimera
strengthened his spell past the point of Ryuzoku endurance. When Irene’s
strength finally gave out and she died, a shudder of pure bliss racked
Zelgadis’ body. “Was it
good for you, too?” The staff laughed as the last of its red light flickered
and went out. If Xellos’
obnoxious piece of wood had hoped to get a reaction from Zelgadis, it was sadly
disappointed. Too much had happened to the chimera. He was no
longer the person he had once been. He could live with what he had done,
he didn’t need to make excuses anymore. What had happened wasn’t his way,
would never be, but he had done it for his love and he could accept it. “Now we
just have to get you to Xellos.” * * * Xellas was
ready. She stroked the blue kitten on her lap thoughtfully. The
chimera had been truly impressive; it was no wonder Xellos had fallen for the
boy. He certainly would be useful to have around…if her Priest-General
decided to keep the shaman. Xellos would be a fool not to, but love made
fools out of everyone from time to time, one reason Mazoku shied from it as
much as possible. At least the following day Xellas would have the chance
to undo one of her own worst mistakes. * * * Dawn came
and rays of falsely cheerful sunlight streamed into Zelgadis’ room. They
mindlessly illuminated the peaceful features of the dead dragon, still bound to
human form on his bed. Unable to sleep, the shaman had spent the evening
making plans for Xellos’ rescue. The increased guard and strengthened wards
made any attempt to sneak the staff in a form of passive suicide.
Everything would depend on their adversary’s overconfidence, on Mirelle
actually allowing the chimera to carry the staff to the Mazoku.
Fortunately, the dragon leader was nothing if not confident. Himitsu
had disappeared again, which was not surprising given that the blue cat had
avoided any contact whatsoever with the Ryuzoku. Zelgadis now had a
strong suspicion as to the cat’s true nature and knew that without the
purple-eyed feline, he would probably never have managed to separate himself
from Mirelle’s dreams. Zelgadis
dressed, putting on his old traveling gear for the first time in weeks although
he left the hood and mask off. It felt right, somehow, to think he would
probably die in those clothes. After all, even if he did succeed and set
his love free, Xellos was still a Mazoku and it was unlikely that he would
allow the chimera to live no matter what feelings the demon once had. And
the shaman understood. In fact, when it came right down to it he
preferred the honesty of the openly evil to the hypocrisy of so-called good
that allowed atrocities to be committed in its name. A last sigh, but no
prayer, left his stone lips as he forced his features to resume the fawning
expression appropriate for the brain-ravaged puppet of a kind Mistress.
He buckled on his sword, grabbed the staff, and left. He made
his way to Mirelle’s office, surprised to find the Ryuzoku looking almost as
exhausted as she had the night before. It was easier to pretend today,
much easier. As sticky as the shaman’s end might be if he were
successful, the dragon’s was apt to be excruciating. He could almost feel
sorry for her. Almost. “Good
morning, Lady. Are you feeling unwell? Perhaps we should put this
off until you are more rested.” “So
considerate, Zel-chan. I will be alright, my own discomfort is nothing
compared to the cause. And good morning to you as well.” She looked
up at the chimera for the first time and her mouth opened in surprise.
“What in Ceipheed’s name are you wearing?” “Well, you
said you wanted it off-balance, Lady. I thought that wearing these
clothes, carrying my sword and especially his staff, would help. Did I do
wrong?” “You know
him better than anyone, so you’re probably right.” The blonde laughed a
little at that. Apparently she still found their tryst humorous.
“But I don’t think it’s a good idea to bring that staff anywhere near
him. As I told you, it’s very powerful.” “As you
wish.” Zelgadis pretended to shrug the issue off, but inside his ribcage
his heart was beating like a wild animal’s. He continued offhandedly,
“But it valued this a very great deal, Lady. The impact of seeing this
staff in another’s hands, especially mine, cannot be underestimated. I
will be very careful to keep my distance, believe me.” The
Ryuzoku appeared to consider the idea for a minute. Before she could
speak, the shaman cut in once more. “Besides, you will be there, surely
you can protect me. I trust you.” Mirelle
looked flattered. Zelgadis barely restrained a grin – he had her!
“Very well,” she said, “Just don’t let it get anywhere near the damn
Mazoku. We need to take a chance if it will help us succeed.” * * * * * ~End Part
3
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